Archers Geek Code

There exists in another world such a thing as the geek code which covers all things computing and geek-like. (Not so) recent posts to UMRA, sparked off by Tim Reid, have uncovered a potential parallel, and so with much trepidation I have expanded on those which we have already seen.

Obviously, any potential additions are most welcome, I'll keep track of UMRAn developments but welcome mail. (Recent UMRA suggestions) Other suggestions that have yet to be included are cricket, church-going and politics .... suggestions for those codes welcome!

Wierdly, this page is listed on Yahoo.

My code would be something like:

'72/12 M B(+) G- A++ L I+ S+(+) P++ CH0

Variables

(Traditional variables are perfectly acceptable, the more common are

S+(+) means that you're normally S+ but occasionally S++
I>+ means you're currently I but hanker after more
B++$ means that you are B++ for a living
?S means that you have no clue what the S category means for you
!L means that you'd rather not say
P@ would mean a certain level of fluidity, generally P but open to change

The Code

Birth Year/Age of start of Archers devotion

(There has been discussion on this, it was original Birth Year/Age/Years of listening, but this method would need continual revision lest it fall out of date.)

Gender

Beard

B+++: I am Robin Fairbairns
B++: I have a beard capable of sustaining independent life (but doesn't :-)
B+: I have elegantly maintained, deliberate growth
B: Not usually, not now
B~: I have a moustache
B-: No facial growth

Glasses

G+++: I have glasses more powerful than the Hubble space telescope
G++: I am as blind as a bat with the specs
G+ or G8: I wear glasses
G(): I occasionally wear glasses
G:: I wear contacts
G-: No glasses

Academia

A+++: I have my own ivory tower
A++: The "real" world brings you out in a rash
A+: I post from a .ac.uk address
A: I was in university, but not now
A-: Never been to university

Librarianism

L+++: I can recite the Dewey decimal system
L++: I am a practising Librarian
L+: I'm an occasional librarian
L: I've visit libraries and borrow books
L-: I know where my nearest library is

IBM

I+++: I am a blood relative of Thomas J Watson
I++: I am a current employee
I+: I've worked for Big Blue, but am currently in remission
I: I've used an IBM machine
I-: I'm not now, nor have I ever been, a member of the Blue party

Southampton (and Hampshire)

S+++: I am the Hampshire Hog
S++: I live in the Southampton/Winchester area
S+: I have lived in the S/W area
S-: I've never lived in the S/W area
S--: I've been to Bournemouth on holiday

Some Suggestions

Simon Pemberton

P+++: I am Harriet Williams
P++: Simon is a poor misguided individual, finding true love for the first time in the canonised arms and is the victim as much of bad scripting as malicious character.
P+: I like Simon
P: He's ok!
P-: Caroline's right, he's not to be trusted
P--: I blame him for Guy's death and he should be sent to Leamington Crown Court to be tried for gun-running

Chocolate

(John Gilliver and *Chloë Wallace)

CH+++: always has some on the person or *"would choose chocolate over a night of passion with (insert name of sex god(ess) of your choice)"
CH++: rarely does 24 hours pass ...
CH+: like chocolate
CH0: can take it or leave it
CH-: don't like it, but tolerate it as an ingredient
CH--: can't stand it
CH---: allergic or similar
(p): A preference for plain chocolate

Level of Devotion

(Stephen Turner) It's been pointed out that repeated the letter A, so where it was A it's now Ar)

Ar+++: I am Norman Painting
Ar++: Don't ring me up between 7.05 and 7.20
Ar+: I listen to the omniloquent edition
Ar0: I know someone who listens
Ar-: Is that *still* on?

Television

(Stephen Turner)

T+++: Television is the work of the Devil
T++: I only watch Top of the Pops/Coronation St/Cricket/etc
T+: See some most days
T0: I can name the cast of Top of the Pops/Coronation St/Cricket/etc
T-: I follow the stars around.

Tyneside

(Steve Riddle) The "H" stand for "Howway" .....

H+++: I am Paul Gascoigne
H++: I was born in St Marys Hospital (or RVI? showing my ignorance now) and can recite Blaydon Races after 15 pints of Broon
H+: I live/have lived near the Tyne
H0: I saw Our Friends in the North/When the Boat Comes In a couple of times
H-: It must get terribly cold north of Watford

Status Quotient

Mike Elwood

Q+++: I am Francis Rossi/Rick Parfitt/I wrote "Caroline"
Q++: I listen, but don't actually dance to them anymore (except at office Christmas parties, of course).
Q+: Oh yeah, Live Aid....good wannit?
Q: Used to like them...they're never still going are they?
Q-: Was it 107 chart songs, or the same song 107 times?
Q--: Saw them recently....in an old folks home...rocking all over the patio
Q---: Neil Diamond is too exciting/noisy for me.

Sheep

Keith Lucas

Sh+++++
(Modesty forbids): Sh++++
(There are no known members of this category.): Sh+++
I am Mrs Sheep.: Sh++
I am very fond of/interested in sheep.: Sh+
I like sheep.: Sh0
I don't think about sheep from one day to the next.: Sh?
What is a sheep?: Sh-
I don't like sheep.: Sh--
I hate sheep. (Currently no known members, previous members done away with by an unknown hand.): Sh*
I am a sheep breeder.: Sh/
I am a sheepdog.: Sh=
I am a sheep.: ShL
I speak the sheep language.: Sh..
I use sheep manure on my garden.: Shzz
I only think about sheep when I go to bed.: Shocker
I am an Australian sheep farmer.: Sh!
Be quiet!: Sh??
I am a sheep information technologist

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